What a difference a holiday can make

A normal day at home begins with Ash rigid with fear as he asks 'what day is it'?  followed by 'what am I doing today'? then a panic that means we have to get up so he can look in the diary and try to work out if he's forgotten anything (this can sometimes be as early as 5am).  This morning it was 'what are we doing today'?  The answer from me was 'nothing'.  His reply?  'I'll go and make a cup of tea then'.  Some of you will know what a relief this is while others can maybe only guess.  I was so worried about how this was all going to turn out and had numerous sleepless nights in the run up as I wondered whether I was doing the right thing by taking him away from everything that is familiar.  Turns out it was the best decision I ever made.

The other thing I've learnt this morning is that it really is best to keep answers short.  Jake and I went on a course at the end of March to learn more about dementia.  It was run by a small charity called The Contented Dementia Trust (http://www.contenteddementiatrust.org) and was more helpful than I could have hoped.  One of their pieces of advice is that if someone with dementia keeps asking the same question it's because you haven't given the answer they want.  Every morning this holiday Ash has asked how I've slept.  Usually I give a complicated reply involving how many times I woke up, how long it took me to go to sleep etc.  I've no idea why I do this as it's not even interesting but I always have.  He then asks me the same question at least another three times.  This morning, heeding my own advice on the 'strategies' page, when I was asked 'did you sleep'?  I replied 'yes'.  Ash said 'good' and that was it.  I really must reread those strategies.