Consequences of not listening to advice

My own advice that is.  This morning started so well that I was back in the land of make-believe where everything was fine and life would get back to normal however we were going grocery shopping and Ash started to make the list as he usually does.  You really don't need the details but a discussion started over light bulbs of all things.  At this point I really should have heeded the TOP TIP on here and on the fb group (both of which I added myself!) regarding 'don't argue' but I genuinely had no idea that this was where we were heading.  I was soon kicking myself for pointing out that we get light bulbs from the local hardware store not the supermarket as, very soon, raised voices could be heard in the house and probably right across the village.  The thing is that if I hadn't started this blog I would no doubt have believed Ash when he told me we were permanently at loggerheads, that he couldn't do anything right and that I was always criticising him.  Luckily I have documented all of the great times we've had over the past few months and how life is so much nicer than before so I know it's only his dementia and lack of self esteem talking and, in fact, by the time we got to the shops we were fine again (remember that one of the benefits of dementia is that nothing lasts for long if you use the right strategies).  However I really wish I'd remembered in time and left the light bulbs alone.  What is particularly galling is that we didn't even need them, they were only to replace the gaps in the cupboard so that we had spares!!!

Now I'm going to heed the TOP TIP fb post from 3rd August which says 'don't beat yourself up if you get it wrong'.


Marcia said…
This is so amazing. It is exactly what has happened too many times to count, going back many years now, finally getting a diagnosis of Mild Cognitive impairment in Feb 2020. So many arguments and fights, me being blamed for critiquing too much so he had no self confidence, and on and on. I didn’t think we would make it. I love the other role about not beating yourself up.