'Rules' to live by

At the very beginning of this journey through dementia our lives were very difficult.  We were both stressed, we argued all the time and I had no understanding of what Ash was going through.  Then (and forgive me if you've heard this before) two things happened.  I talked to a friend in a similar position and he gave me some strategies to use then Jake and I went on a course run by the Contented Dementia Trust where we were given additional strategies and a completely different way of viewing what was happening to us.  All of these things improved our lives almost overnight and we have rarely looked back (however I'm not a saint and so I do occasionally slip). 

Now when I was first given all that advice I was at rock bottom and couldn't see a way out.  I was so desperate that I would have tried anything to help us and any advice was gratefully accepted.  A couple of days ago I saw a list of 'rules' very similar to the 'Top Tips' page on this blog.  I was really pleased to see all the strategies on it as, as far as I'm concerned, they will help everyone dealing with dementia in any way and will make life easier for all affected by this disability.  I was surprised then to read comments from people cross because they were expected to be 'saints' and that it was too much to expect them to follow the list as well as coping with their difficult lives.  My advice to anyone dealing with dementia is to try these strategies however hard you think they may be to follow.  Whatever stage you're at they will make your life better even if it's only because you will feel in control possibly for the first time in a long while. 

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