Can you have too much positivity?
Last night a friend and I had a discussion over whether I was being just a little too positive and maybe bottling things up slightly too much and that, as conversations often do nowadays, got me thinking. She was only thinking of me and I realise that focusing on the positive doesn't/wouldn't work for everyone, I'm also fairly sure that sometimes I'm a little too Pollyanna-ish in my outlook but it really does make me feel better and gets me through what's happening.
There are two songs which I think illustrate exactly what I mean and both were on the radio at the weekend. The first was 'Without You' by Nilson which, as I've mentioned before, has been our song since the beginning. This was playing when we were out in the car on Saturday and the words had tears streaming down my face (www.google.co.uk/search?ei=sv-PW6qJDZL2gAb7rrWoBg&q=without+you+lyrics+nilsson&oq=without&gs_l=psy-ab.1.0.35i39k1l2j0i67k1j0i131i20i263k1j0i67k1j0i131k1j0i67k1l2j0l2.775742.783566.0.7855126.96.36.199.0.0.0.230.1649.6j6j1.13.0....0...1.1.64.psy-ab..1.13.1642...0i7i30k1j0i13k1j0i7i10i30k1j0i8i7i30k1j0i13i30k1j0i10k1.0.jmecBb-aDPg) . Luckily dementia means that Ash rarely notices how I'm feeling nowadays and by the time we got out of the car I'd pulled myself together.
The second song was 'I Will Survive' by Gloria Gaynor and this was far more useful in my opinion www.google.co.uk/search?ei=eP6PW-DsJsbMgAa275qwDg&q=i+will+survive+gloria+gaynor+lyrics&oq=I+will+&gs_l=psy-ab.1.0.35i39k1j0i67k1l9.309392.310477.0.312188.8.131.52.0.0.0.188.698.3j3.6.0....0...1.1.64.psy-ab..1.6.696...0i20i263k1.0.BS9F6LiG1e8) althoughI would like to point out here that I use this as a rant against dementia not Ash.
So which would you find most helpful in this fight to stay ahead of the game? I choose the second and play it as loudly as I can stand as often as possible singing along the whole time. I could of course play 'Without You' just as regularly but I'm not sure what that would achieve other than an inclination to sit and feel sorry for myself which wouldn't be helpful and would make me very poor company for those around us. Neither would it help Ash who needs me to be upbeat and cheerful at all times.
I'm not saying that this is easy and I'm not saying that I don't get upset but for me tears are best shed in private and it's the smiling face I turn to the world which has the most positive effect.