The joys of relinquishing responsibility for a while
This morning Jake came over so that he and Ash could go for a walk complete with dog and cameras. The weather was glorious, the dog was excited and Ash was anxious although he tried hard to hide it. Think this is the first time for months and months he has gone anywhere other than the local town or the tip without me and he obviously found it a little daunting. However he went and I had two whole hours to myself without having to worry about him. The sense of relief was greater than I would ever have believed possible. It was as though a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders and everything seemed brighter. This did feel odd as I hadn't realised how much I was struggling but think that's so often the case. When you are in the middle of a situation you plough on. It's only when you have time to lift your head and look at the view that you realise how difficult things have been. Anyway the walk was a success on all sides and there will be more of them apparently so that's more breathing space for me, male company for Ash and a chance for two of my three favourite boys to reconnect (the third is of course the nearly 5 year old). I recommend it on all counts.