I remember when ..........

....... weekends away were relaxing and moods didn't turn in a heartbeat.  Yesterday and the beginning of today were lovely.  The cottage has just what we need, Ash was completely at ease despite the long drive, the dog's happy and all was going to plan.  The weather's awful but that wouldn't usually matter, after all we have proper 'gear' from all those years of walking and camping, however I managed to remember every single thing except Ash's waterproof coat so off we went in search of an outdoor shop.  This being the lake district we didn't have to travel very far and he liked the first one he tried on so once again we were on track.  We found a lovely place for coffee where we could sit and watch the world go by as though we didn't have a care in the world and the good mood lasted right until we got back to the cottage and Ash decided he had no idea where we were.  I had a map so tried to explain but apparently when I suggested we stood at the front door and turned our heads to the right so that I could point out which road we could see crossing the end of ours I wasn't specific enough and a meltdown ensued.  Somehow I kept my temper under control (and yes I do know it's not his fault in any way, shape or form but I'm not a saint and sometimes knowing all that doesn't help) and we got round it all to the point where we managed a walk down to Lake Windermere.  We wandered through drizzle but definitely returned to the cottage feeling better than when we left so proof again, if we needed it, that there is always a way through the difficult moments even if the process is occasionally exhausting.

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Ann said…
Proof, if proof were neeed, how well you’re doing at handling Ash’s memory ‘blips’. Well done, Jane!
Lesley said…
Hats off to you, Jane. It must be so frustrating, and exhausting, and upsetting - you are doing a grand job and managed to make this a 'minor blip' when it could easily have escalated and completely ruined your weekend. So, so glad it didn't.
Jane said…
I think one of the hardest parts of the blips is knowing that if i'd managed things differently the melt down could have been avoided. The other really difficult part is that before dementia if we'd had a row we would always have made up. There would have been an apology, a hug, a 'sorry I didn't mean it'. Now there's nothing because immediately the melt down is over Ash has forgotten every little detail and even though I know he can't help it that still hurts.