What a difference a week makes

Seven days ago I left the house in turmoil.  Ash had been shouting as usual, I had been crying as usual and it seemed as though we would be living in misery for ever more.  The big discussion two days before had meant I thought we were over the worst but the worst is when you think everything is sorted and then you discover you're right back at the beginning.  Except we weren't (right back at the beginning that is).  This time I hadn't been able to contain myself so I phoned him half an hour into my journey and said it all over again and this time, because we weren't starting right back at the beginning, the words stuck.  I actually made an impression and proved at least to myself that I hadn't been wrong, that somewhere in the midst of the dementia the old Ash still existed which was something I'd begun to doubt.  Now we're a week on and enjoying life again.  There hasn't been a single outburst; he's taking the dog on longer and longer walks; he's taking an interest in the development of my 'sanctuary' and making suggestions for colour and furnishings (a definite benefit of the changes taking place in his brain I have to say); he's mowing the lawn and this morning when we woke he actually asked how I was!  I hadn't realised how soul destroying our lives had become until this week when it all became so much better so my advice to any of you going through something similar for whatever reason is to go with your instinct.  Life may not be perfect but it doesn't have to be awful only it's up to you to make sure you're not settling for 'better than nothing'.

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Lesley said…
Fantastic that life is looking up. (I love the Steve Jobs quote!)
Jane said…
Am trying not to be too optimistic as things can change in a heartbeat but this feels different. He seems so much more relaxed and so much happier that I'm really hopeful we've turned a corner.
Karen said…
It all sounds very positive - really good news.