Are you a 'Life Enricher'?

Walt Disney once said that there were three types of people in the world: Well Poisoners who discourage you at every opportunity and suck any enthusiasm out of life, Lawn Mowers who are well intentioned but self-absorbed and Life Enrichers who reach out to enrich the lives of people around them.  For more detail on this you need to go to   https://thinkhumanity.wordpress.com/2009/10/21/three-types-of-people-in-the-world-be-a-life-enhancer/, for my thoughts on the subject however you can stay right here.  But, you might think, how is this relevant in our world of dementia?  How does the topic touch our lives and is she really thinking about us?  Well I'm certainly thinking about me and maybe, just maybe, my thoughts on me might help you.  Reading the piece on Walt Disney I realised that, although I tried in the past to be a Life Enricher, I was much more of a Lawn Mower.  I did what I needed to do, I spent time with friends and family, I hope I was fun to be with but work always seemed to get in the way and there was never quite enough time or energy to be a proper Life Enricher.  Ash however really was a Life Enricher.  He was fun to be around, always laughing and joking, always ready to help people, to put in extra effort, to make sure life was an adventure so now I have time to think, to appreciate and to enjoy, without thinking, I've begun to work towards being that all important Life Enricher myself.  I don't always get it right but I hope I'm closer than I was and I think it makes a difference to our life in general.  We hear a great deal about how friends desert as soon as dementia takes hold of a person or family close to them and, mostly, we lay the blame at the door of those friends.  Why don't they understand?  Why don't they stick around to help?  Why don't they visit and at least pretend to be supportive?  I've thought and thought about this and realised that it might sometimes just depend on the sort of person we are.  I absolutely realise that not all desertion is our fault, some people can't cope with illness in others, some friends might see elements of the dementia in themselves and be burying their heads in the sand and yet others might not be real friends at all (and I'm not even going to think about family who are a separate entity with rules and emotions all of their own) but what I have realised is that not one of our friends has deserted us.  Every single one has stuck around, supported us, shown their concern and made sure life is as easy for us at it can be whether that's by checking on how Ash is, phoning to see if I'm ok, inviting us round for a meal, including us in events, offering help in a variety of ways etc. etc.  All these things have made our lives immeasurably better but we can't be the only ones with these types of friends, good people who are there for us whenever we need them.    Personally I think it's because they're life enrichers themselves but I'm also hoping it's because they want to be with us as much as for any other reason.  Now think of all your friends, are they Well Poisoners, Lawn Mowers or Life Enrichers?  Also, which ones have stayed around?  Once you've worked that out you'll know which you want to become yourself.  Or maybe you're already there in which case you can relax and take it easy.  Me I'm still working towards becoming a Life Enricher just like all my friends.

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