Confusion reigns today
Today hasn't been quite so full of joy as yesterday mainly because Ash has been confused and I've been cleaning both of which may be inextricably linked but I'd like to think not. I thought I had the confusion under control but this morning he really couldn't get his head around the number of times he was allowed to take the dog for a walk or where he could go both of which seemed perfectly clear to him yesterday and just shows how dementia messes with the brain. Wendy Mitchell, author of 'Somebody I Used to Know' (a highly recommended read), says that it's a bit like having fairy lights inside your head, sometimes they work and sometimes they don't and sometimes some of them work and sometimes none of them do and today it seemed as though quite a few of Ash's lights weren't working. Anyway we've muddled through the day separately; I had a virtual coffee and chat with a friend first thing while Ash walked the dog somewhere around the village, I did some of the dreaded cleaning while he cleaned the windows, we had lunch in separate rooms and then I walked across the fields with the dog to the next village before turning round and ambling back again all without seeing another soul. Now back home, tea in the oven and working out how to keep Ash occupied tomorrow and that's one of the hardest things. I need to find jobs he's not only still capable of doing easily but also ones he'll like doing and will get a sense of satisfaction from. Not only that but I can only mention them in a throwaway comment because if I suggest them as a 'thing' he feels under pressure and panics. I have commented on the state of the fences in the garden which seemed to go down well and I have a large tub of fence paint just waiting to be opened but we'll see if anything comes of it. I'll let you know if it does but I promise it won't be the end of the world if it doesn't.
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