A tan (of sorts) is developing

Those of you who've been following this blog for a while may remember the slight mishap I had with spray tan last summer.  We were going to the wedding of a dear family friend who we'd know almost since he was a baby and the weather leading up to the big day had been dreadful.  In fact it had rained so much that the groom's mum had bought silver wellies to match her outfit just in case so you can see why my tan wasn't as good as it could have been and I really, really wanted brown legs to go with my cream dress so spray tan it was.  Only I followed the instructions rather than taking the advice of a friend who knows about these things and I just sprayed the stuff on without rubbing it in.  Not only that but when my legs didn't go brown immediately I sprayed some more and then went to bed without a concern in my head.  If you've forgotten or weren't on board at that time I'm here to tell you that the next morning, the day before the wedding, my legs were orange.  Not only that but they were orange in patches and those patches were very odd shapes so I was traumatised with no idea what to do.  I emailed the friend whose advice I'd ignored and she was magnanimous enough to ignore my stupidity and gave some suggestions on what to do to minimize the problem and those suggestions worked well enough that I think I got away with it on the day.  If I didn't then everyone was too well mannered to mention it.  So that was last summer and I haven't given it another thought until recently when I decided to make the most of the sun during lockdown.  I put my shorts on, layered up the sun oil and went out to weed the garden.  I've now done the very same thing several days in a row and have noticed something bizzare - those odd shaped patches from last summer are emerging to mock me.  Where my legs were one solid shade of pale that I expected to turn an even golden brown I now have the look of someone who's covered themselves very badly with spray tan and I find it so unfair.  I learnt my lesson last summer;  I've vowed never to do anything quite so foolish ever again but still it looks as though I have and it almost feels as though the sun is taunting me for my foolishness.  On the bright side, one of the benefits of Ash's dementia is that he's unlikely to notice so I might get away with it, at home anyway.

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