Not easier or harder just different

Yesterday, you may remember, I joined some friends on the beautifully mown field in front of the house for a socially distanced coffee.  The sun was shining, my tan was topped up, we put the world to rights and discussed my birthday and I thought 'maybe this is the way forward'. I have a feeling you see that my coffees and mornings/afternoons out might be a thing of the past when this pandemic is over.  Before the lockdown I walked with friends two mornings a week and then it was coffee/lunch/afternoon tea on many of the other days.  I had realised that whole days out were a thing of the past but it seemed to me that if Ash was only on his own for half of each day everything would be ok.  Now however he's had my undivided attention almost all day, every day for the past nine weeks and it seems he's got used to it.  So yesterday I sat 100 yards from the front door, he could see me out of the window and the whole thing lasted for an hour and a half, what could possibly be wrong with that?  What I think was wrong with it was that I wasn't in the garden with him and it made him nervous.  I know that Ash's behaviour is a result of his environment, he's not just being difficult and it's the dementia which throws up the challenges so when, in the afternoon, he began to follow me around I knew why, when he came to find me again and again I knew why, when he just stood at the side of me watching what I was doing I knew why and I now need to work out what to do about it all.  To have a plan when the lockdown is over.  The walks will continue as long as possible but the coffees just might have to take place here.  But then again it might have been a one off and that's the thing with dementia, just when you think you've covered all eventualities it throws you a curve ball.

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