More than just a 'day in the life of...... '
Today is our wedding anniversary. Thirty eight years ago today we stood in front of a hundred people and made those vows, agreeing to 'have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part'. You'll note I hope that, even at the age of 21, I didn't promise to obey but we'd been together six years by the time we got married so Ash knew even then what he was letting himself in for. My Mum wasn't particularly happy at the way I tied myself down from the age of 15 and those six years before we married were spent battling for the life I wanted with the person I wanted so now if people wonder why, when things are difficult, I don't leave I point to that and say I didn't spend all that time and energy to get what I wanted just to quit when the going gets tough. This isn't how I envisaged spending our retirement but it is what it is and I'm committed to doing the best I can. That doesn't mean however that I'm entirely content with the way today has passed with no knowledge on Ash's part of it's importance but things could be worse. Last year was a disaster just because I had certain expectations. In the past we've always celebrated important dates such as birthdays, Christmas, Valentine's Day and wedding anniversaries. There would have been walks on the beach, maybe a picnic of champagne and smoked salmon, surprise presents, unexpected treats, anything in fact to underline the importance of the occasion to us. Last year, foolishly, I thought I could recreate those moments and pretend things were still the same so I organised a trip to the beach with a picnic only to realise once we got there that Ash was in a flat panic about it all and just wanted to be at home. I got upset, he was bewildered and everything was spoiled. This year I'm wiser and, although I was a little sad this morning that thirty eight years of marriage was passing without comment, it was so much easier than twelve months ago when I still had so much to learn.