Life gets just that little bit more difficult

So we're in tier 3 which means we still can't get out for those cups of tea in an afternoon but to be honest Ash seems just as happy with me joining him in front of the tv at 4pm every day so he won't mind at all and it's only me who will be thinking wistfully of the friends I was planning to meet and the mini escapes that were in my diary.  If it gets us all back on track however it will be worth it so I'm blocking out those thoughts and redirecting them, as usual, towards more pleasant things.  

BUT it's actually not just the new Covid restrictions which have pulled me up short as today seems to have seen more of that gently slide into dementia that I've been half expecting beginning with waking up this morning to Ash turning to me and saying 'I can't remember what we do in a morning'.  Part of me was downhearted at this but part of me was pleased because for once he wasn't upset and he didn't seem anxious; instead he seemed to be putting his trust in me to sort it out for him which was lovely in an odd sort of way.  I made the tea as usual then left him to go out for my walk which, as reported yesterday, gave his head time to clear and when I came home he was his usual sunny self.  Thursday is shopping day and this is when the next oddity happened.  At the first of our two supermarkets he couldn't work out how to get the coin out of the trolley and then at the next one he tried to put a coin in when one wasn't needed.  These are the same two supermarkets that we use in the same order every single week so I was taken aback a little even though I should know by now to expect the unexpected.  Three new things then in one day, three things that once he would have done without thinking but now can't do even when thinking very, very hard and that's what I'm here for, to take the stress out of it all and make sure he can continue to function as well as he's able for as long as he's able.

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Comments

Tehachap said…
I like your sayings at the end of your posts. Today's was especially true--we must always be there for our loved ones. So very sorry Ash is slipping away. Know that you are not alone in your journey. Blessings to you and Ash.
Jane said…
Thank you. I do know I'm not alone and that really does help.