Almost a crisis

 Yesterday I started to tell you about the difficult start to my day when Ash came through at 4am to tell me off for talking to him about some subject he couldn't remember.  I wrote about the cup of tea I took him along with his tablets to calm him down and then about how I escaped to the beach the minute L arrived to take my place.  I told you about the relaxing time I had just lying on the sand, soaking up the sun and listening to lovely music and I was about to tell you that when I got home it was to discover he'd spent the day up and down, in and out, unable to settle at all so it was obvious that things weren't right.

All of that was on this page when, at 7pm I realised that Max the dog had spent the past 2 hrs walking round and round the garden unable to settle and every other thought left my head.  Either Max had picked up on Ash's anxiety or there was something going on with him too.

This was not good.  Max is at the very top of Ash's list of important family members.  I like to think that Jake, the 7 year old and I are of equal rank but we come nowhere near Max and I'm currently nurturing him more than I've nurtured any dog we've ever had.  He's 12 now so anything which requires a vet isn't good news and I immediately started to worry.

This could be a very long story but you don't have time so I'll just say that our usual vet wasn't available but I had one of those very useful lightbulb moments and contacted someone I know just a little and who is a vet.  She came straight over and made some suggestions of what it might be and what to do to ease the situation then left telling me to call her if I was in the least worried later on.  Of this stuff angels are made.

She did say that if Max was no better by 11pm then to call the out of hours vet but I had no idea how I'd manage the dog AND Ash if we had to go anywhere at that time of night so I crossed my fingers and hoped for the best.

I'm sure you'll be pleased to know that when I came down this morning Max was absolutely fine and neither he nor Ash seemed to have any recollection of how we'd spent the previous evening and neither of them had any idea how long I'd laid awake trying to work out what I'd do if Max didn't survive.

Life with dementia is mostly about hoping life doesn't throw out too many changes, trying to work out what to do if change is unavoidable or pretending all is ok in the midst of a crisis.  Last night I was doing all three.

Don't forget you can sign up to have this delivered straight into your inbox, just remember to click on the validation email (which may be in your junk mail/trash box).  You can share specific posts with others by clicking on the 3 dots at the top right hand corner of the page, you can share the blog by copying and pasting the web address or you can email me at if you have anything you want to say privately.  You can also now follow me on twitter, just search for Memory For Two, and you can find me on facebook


CW said…
Goodness. I certainly feel for you and know that feeling of "what will I do?" I'm in the same boat as you. Do take care and I'm very glad things worked out for you. Wondering why Ash was upset and whether he sensed something going on with the dog rather than the other way around!
Jane said…
It could have been but I have a feeling that the trip down memory lane unsettled him as he's been a little anxious and confused ever since Tuesday. Think I might avoid doing that particular activity in future.
Carol S said…
So glad to hear Max is OK. We are in a similar situation ourselves with an ageing dog. Wishing all three of you well 🤗
Jane said…
Max is absolutely fine except he's now on a diet (because I think the extra weight he's been carrying didn't help the situation) so he's not particularly happy.

several people have suggested I introduce a puppy into our lives but am sure many will understand when I say I have no wish to be left on my own with a young dog. when this is all over I have no plans to sit back and take it easy, there's going to be a lot of time to make up for. Also one of the wonderful things about Max is that he knows which direction to head in for his walks, he knows where to cross the road, he doesn't need to go on a lead, he never gets lost etc, etc, the truth is that Ash is safe with Max and a new dog could never achieve that.