Being relaxed really is the key

Last night was really lovely and reinforced everything I've been saying about my moods being reflected in Ash.  If you read yesterday's post you'll know that I came home particularly stressed and exhausted and found Ash more uptight than I've seen him in a long time.  He had no idea what day it was, where he was or what time I'd been due home.  Apart from the couple of years leading up to the diagnosis home has always been my sanctuary and as soon as I've walked through the gate I've felt the stresses of the day begin to melt away.  I was surprised to find that yesterday was no different.  I walked in the back door and, even though I could see what was facing me, I felt myself relax and that really is the key to everything.  Tea was organised even though Ash didn't realise it so that was easy, we ate on our knees in front of the fire as we still have no central heating and then for the next three hours we watched all of his favourite quiz shows.  As we sat watching the television I could almost feel him uncoiling and soon he was passing comment on the contestants, answering questions and asking how my mum was.  Do you see what I mean about lovely?  The lesson here is that even when life is at it's most stressful it's so important to relax whenever you can.  You may think it's an impossible ask but there will be a way if only you look hard enough and it will make all the difference I promise.


Don't forget to leave a comment if you have any thoughts on anything in this blog or email me at memoryfortwo@gmail.com


Comments

Sarah H said…
Glad Ash is back on track. The assessment for your mum will be a really good thing. Now relax for a week 🙂
Lesley said…
That all sounds really good. You're right about the relaxing thing - love the quote.
Jane said…
the quote had just come up on my fb page as I was typing the post. it's amazing how often that happens.
Michael said…
Relaxing is the key!! Doing it this week and we both feel in sync. I’ve also lowered my expectations which has helped me no end. We are both that relaxed that we are dosing in front of the TV zzzzzzzz
Ann said…
‘Going with the flow’ is, in my experience, the best way to live with Dementia. As Michael said ‘lowering my expectations’ and (provided it’s not dangerous) simply agreeing to live the way my O.H. feels happiest, has helped us both feel more relaxed.

Okay, so our days do not follow the ‘normal’ pattern of our friends, family and peers (eg we may sleep at odd times, eat our meals much earlier than other people etc. etc.) But if it means less stress for my beloved, than the impact on my own sanity is much reduced.

Good to read you are both okay, Jane. As always, you are in my thoughts.
Jane said…
I love the positive attitudes shining through these comments and the fact that there are other people out there recognising that the only way forward is acceptance of the situation.